马克·吐温

MarkTwain

马克·吐温（MarkTwain，1835—1910），美国幽默大师、小说家、著名演说家，19世纪后期美国现实主义文学的杰出代表。作品风格以幽默与讽刺为主，既富于独特的个人机智与妙语，又不乏深刻的社会洞察与剖析。主要的代表作品有《哈克贝利·费恩历险记》（长篇）、《百万英镑》（短篇）等。

NightbeforelastIhadasingulardream.Iseemedtobesittingonadoorste（innoarticularcityerhas）ruminating,andthetimeofnightaearedtobeabouttwelveoroneo‘clock.Theweatherwasbalmyanddelicious.Therewasnohumansoundintheair,notevenafootste.Therewasnosoundofanykindtoemhasizethedeadstillness,excettheoccasionalhollowbarkingofadoginthedistanceandthefainteranswerofafurtherdog.PresentlyuthestreetIheardabonyclack-clacking,andguesseditwasthecastanetsofaserenadingarty.Inaminutemoreatallskeleton,hooded,andhalfcladinatatteredandmoldyshroud,whoseshredswerefaingabouttheribbylatticeworkofitserson,swungbymewithastatelystrideanddisaearedinthegraygloomofthestarlight.Ithadabrokenandworm-eatencoffnonitsshoulderandabundleofsomethinginitshand.Iknewwhattheclack-clackingwasthen；itwasthisarty’sjointsworkingtogether,andhiselbowsknockingagainsthissidesashewalked.ImaysayIwassurrised.BeforeIcouldcollectmythoughtsandenteruonanyseculationsastowhatthisaaritionmightortend,IheardanotheronecomingforIrecognizedhisclack-clack.Hehadtwo-thirdsofacoffinonhisshoulder,andsomefootandheadboardsunderhisarm.Imightilywanted,toeerunderhishoodandseaktohim,butwhenheturnedandsmileduonmewithhiscavernoussocketsandhisrojectinggrinashewentby,IthoughtIwouldnotdetainhim.HewashardlygonewhenIheardtheclackingagain,andanotheroneissuedfromtheshadowyhalf-light.Thisonewasbendingunderaheavygravestone,anddraggingashabbycoffnafterhimbyastring.Whenhegottomehegavemeasteadylookforamomentortwo,andthenroundedtoandbackedutome,saying：

“Easethisdownforafellow,willyou?”

Ieasedthegravestonedowntillitrestedontheground,andindoingsonoticedthatitborethenameof“JohnBaxterComanhurst，”with“May，1839，”asthedateofhisdeath.Deceasedsatwearilydownbyme,andwiedhisfrontalwithhismajormaxillary-chiefyfromformerhabitIjudged,forIcouldnotseethathebroughtawayanyersiration.

“Itistoobad,toobad，”saidhe,drawingtheremnantoftheshroudabouthimandleaninghisjawensivelyonhishand.Thenheuthisleftfootuonhiskneeandfelltoscratchinghisankleboneabsentlywitharustynailwhichhegotoutofhiscoffn.

“Whatistoobad,friend?”

“Oh,everything,everything.IalmostwishIneverhaddied.”

“Yousurriseme.Whydoyousaythis?Hasanythinggonewrong?Whatisthematter?”

“Matter！Lookatthisshroud-rags.Lookatthisgravestone,allbatteredu.Lookatthatdisgracefuloldcoffn.Allamansroertygoingtoruinanddestructionbeforehiseyes,andaskhimifanythingiswrong?Fireandbrimstone！”

“Calmyourself,calmyourself，”Isaid.“Itistoobad-itiscertainlytoobad,butthenIhadnotsuosedthatyouwouldmuchmindsuchmatterssituatedasyouare.”

“Well,mydearsir,Idomindthem.Myrideishurt,andmycomfortisimaired-destroyed,Imightsay.Iwillstatemycase-Iwillutittoyouinsuchawaythatyoucancomrehendit,ifyouwillletme，”saidtheoorskeleton,tiltingthehoodofhisshroudback,asifhewereclearingforaction,andthusunconsciouslygivinghimselfajauntyandfestiveairverymuchatvariancewiththegravecharacterofhisositioninlife-sotoseak-andinrominentcontrastwithhisdistressfulmood.

“Proceed，”saidI.

“Iresideintheshamefuloldgraveyardablockortwoaboveyouhere,inthisstreet-there,now,Ijustexectedthatcartilagewouldletgo！-thirdribfromthebottom,friend,hitchtheendofittomysinewithastring,ifyouhavegotsuchathingaboutyou,thoughabitofsilverwireisadealleasanter,andmoredurableandbecoming,ifonekeesitolished-tothinkofshreddingoutandgoingtoiecesinthisway,justonaccountoftheindifferenceandneglectofonesosterity！”-andtheoorghostgratedhisteethinawaythatgavemeawrenchandashiver-fortheeffectismightilyincreasedbytheabsenceofmuffingfeshandcuticle.“Iresideinthatoldgraveyard,andhaveforthesethirtyyears；andItellyouthingsarechangedsinceIfrstlaidthisoldtiredframethere,andturnedover,andstretchedoutforalongslee,withadelicioussenseuonmeofbeingdonewithbother,andgrief,andanxiety,anddoubt,andfear,foreverandever,andlisteningwithcomfortableandincreasingsatisfactiontothesextonswork,fromthestartlingclatterofhisfrstsadefulonmycoffntillitdulledawaytothefaintattingthatshaedtheroofofmynewhome-delicious！My！Iwishyoucouldtryittonight！”Andoutofmyreveriedeceasedfetchedmearattlingslawithabonyhand.

“Yes,sir,thirtyyearsagoIlaidmedownthere,andwashay.Foritwasoutinthecountrythen-outinthebreezy,fowery,grandoldwoods,andthelazywindsgossiedwiththeleaves,andthesquirrelscaeredoverusandaroundus,andthecreeingthingsvisitedus,andthebirdsflledthetranquilsolitudewithmusic.Ah,itwasworthtenyearsofamanslifetobedeadthen！Everythingwasleasant.Iwasinagoodneighborhood,forallthedeadeolethatlivednearmebelongedtothebestfamiliesinthecity.Ourosterityaearedtothinktheworldofus.Theyketourgravesintheverybestcondition；thefenceswerealwaysinfaultlessreair,head-boardswereketaintedorwhitewashed,andwererelacedwithnewonesassoonastheybegantolookrustyordecayed；monumentswereketuright,railingsintactandbright,therose-bushesandshrubberytrimmed,trained,andfreefromblemish,thewalkscleanandsmoothandgraveled.Butthatdayisgoneby.Ourdescendantshaveforgottenus.Mygrandsonlivesinastatelyhousebuiltwithmoneymadebytheseoldhandsofmine,andIsleeinaneglectedgravewithinvadingverminthatgnawmyshroudtobuildthemnestswithal！Iandfriendsthatliewithmefoundedandsecuredtheroserityofthisfnecity,andthestatelybantlingofourlovesleavesustorotinadilaidatedcemeterywhichneighborscurseandstrangersscoffat.Seethedifferencebetweentheoldtimeandthis-forinstance：Ourgravesareallcavedinnow；ourhead-boardshaverottedawayandtumbleddown；ourrailingsreelthiswayandthat,withonefootintheair,afterafashionofunseemlylevity；ourmonumentsleanwearily,andourgravestonesbowtheirheadsdiscouraged；therebenoadornmentsanymore-noroses,norshrubs,norgraveledwalks,noranythingthatisacomforttotheeye；andeventheaintlessoldboardfencethatdidmakeashowofholdingussacredfromcomanionshiwithbeastsandthedeflementofheedlessfeet,hastotteredtillitoverhangsthestreet,andonlyadvertisestheresenceofourdismalresting-laceandinvitesyetmorederisiontoit.Andnowwecannothideourovertyandtattersinthefriendlywoods,forthecityhasstretcheditswitheringarmsabroadandtakenusin,andallthatremainsofthecheerofouroldhomeistheclusteroflugubriousforesttreesthatstand,boredandwearyofacitylife,withtheirfeetinourcoffns,lookingintothehazydistanceandwishingtheywerethere.Itellyouitisdisgraceful！”

“Youbegintocomrehend-youbegintoseehowitis.Whileourdescendantsarelivingsumtuouslyonourmoney,rightaroundusinthecity,wehavetofghthardtokeeskullandbonestogether.Blessyou,thereisn‘tagraveinourcemeterythatdoesn’tleaknotone.Everytimeitrainsinthenightwehavetoclimboutandroostinthetreesandsometimeswearewakenedsuddenlybythechillywatertricklingdownthebackofournecks.ThenItellyouthereisageneralheavinguofoldgravesandkickingoverofoldmonuments,andscameringofoldskeletonsforthetrees！Blessme,ifyouhadgonealongtheresomesuchnightsaftertwelveyoumighthaveseenasmanyasffteenofusroostingononelimb,withourjointsrattlingdrearilyandthewindwheezingthroughourribs！Manyatimewehaveerchedthereforthreeorfourdrearyhours,andthencomedown,stiffandchilledthroughanddrowsy,andborrowedeachother‘sskullstobailoutourgraveswith-ifyouwillglanceuinmymouthnowasItiltmyheadback,youcanseethatmyhead-ieceishalffullofolddrysedimenthowto-heavyandstuiditmakesmesometimes！Yes,sir,manyatimeifyouhadhaenedtocomealongjustbeforethedawnyou’dhavecaughtusbailingoutthegravesandhangingourshroudsonthefencetodry.Why,Ihadanelegantshroudstolenfromthereonemorning-thinkaartybythenameofSmithtookit,thatresidesinalebeiangraveyardoveryonder-IthinksobecausethefrsttimeIeversawhimhehadn‘tanythingonbutacheckshirt,andthelasttimeIsawhim,whichwasatasocialgatheringinthenewcemetery,hewasthebest-dressedcorseinthecomany-anditisasignifcantfactthatheleftwhenhesawme；andresentlyanoldwomanfromheremissedhercoffin-shegenerallytookitwithherwhenshewentanywhere,becauseshewasliabletotakecoldandbringonthesasmodicrheumatismthatoriginallykilledherifsheexosedherselftothenightairmuch.ShewasnamedHotchkiss-AnnaMatildaHotchkiss-youmightknowher?Shehastwouerfrontteeth,istall,butagooddealinclinedtostoo,oneribontheleftsidegone,hasoneshredofrustyhairhangingfromtheleftsideofherhead,andonelittletuftjustaboveandalittleforwardofherrightear,hasherunderjawwiredononesidewhereithadworkedloose,smallboneofleftforearmgone-lostinafghthasakindofswaggerinhergaitanda’galluswayofgoingwith：herarmsakimboandhernostrilsintheairhasbeenrettyfreeandeasy,andisalldamagedandbatteredutillshelookslikeaqueenswarecrateinruins-maybeyouhavemether?”

“Godforbid！”Iinvoluntarilyejaculated,forsomehowIwasnotlookingforthatformofquestion,anditcaughtmealittleoffmyguard.ButIhastenedtomakeamendsformyrudeness,andsay，“IsimlymeantIhadnothadthehonor-forIwouldnotdeliberatelyseakdiscourteouslyofafriendofyours.Youweresayingthatyouwererobbed-anditwasashame,too-butitaearsbywhatisleftoftheshroudyouhaveonthatitwasacostlyoneinitsday.Howdid……”

Amostghastlyexressionbegantodeveloamongthedecayedfeaturesandshriveledintegumentsofmyguest‘sface,andIwasbeginningtogrowuneasyanddistressed,whenhetoldmehewasonlyworkinguadee,smile,withawinkinit,tosuggestthataboutthetimeheacquiredhisresentgarmentaghostinaneighboringcemeterymissedone.Thisreassuredme,butIbeggedhimtoconfnehimselftoseechthenceforth,becausehisfacialexressionwasuncertain.Evenwiththemostelaboratecareitwasliabletomissfire.Smilingshouldeseciallybeavoided.Whathemighthonestlyconsiderashiningsuccesswaslikelytostrikemeinaverydifferentlight.IsaidIlikedtoseeaskeletoncheerful,evendecorouslylayful,butIdidnotthinksmilingwasaskeleton’sbesthold.

“Yes,friend，”saidtheoorskeleton，“thefactsarejustasIhavegiventhemtoyou.Twooftheseoldgraveyards-theonethatIresidedinandonefurtheralonghavebeendeliberatelyneglectedbyourdescendantsoftodayuntilthereisnooccuyingthemanylonger.Asidefromtheosteologicaldiscomfortofit-andthatisnolightmatterthisrainyweather-theresentstateofthingsisruinoustoroerty.Wehavegottomoveorbecontenttoseeoureffectswastedawayandutterlydestroyed.”

Now,youwillhardlybelieveit,butitistrue,nevertheless,thatthereisn‘tasinglecoffningoodreairamongallmyacquaintance-nowthatisanabsolutefact.Idonotrefertoloweolewhocomeinaineboxmountedonanexress-wagon,butIamtalkingaboutyourhigh-toned,silver-mountedburial-case,yourmonumentalsort,thattravelunderblacklumesattheheadofarocessionandhavechoiceofcemeterylots-ImeanfolksliketheJarvises,andtheBledsoesandtheBurlings,andsuch.Theyareallaboutruined.Themostsubstantialeoleinourset,theywere.Andnowlookatthem-utterlyuseduandoverty-stricken.OneoftheBledsoesactuallytradedhismonumenttoalatebarkeeerforsomefreshshavingstoutunderhishead.Itellyouitseaksvolumes,forthereisnothingacorsetakessomuchrideinashismonument.Helovestoreadtheinscrition.Hecomesafterawhiletobelievewhatitsayshimself,andthenyoumayseehimsittingonthefencenightafternightenjoyingit.Eitahsarechea,andtheydoaoorchaaworldofgoodafterheisdead,eseciallyifhehadhardluckwhilehewasalive.Iwishtheywereusedmore.NowIdon’tcomlain,butconfdentiallyIdothinkitwasalittleshabbyinmydescendantstogivemenothingbutthisoldslabofagravestone-andallthemorethatthereisntacomlimentonit.Itusedtohave：

GONETOHISJUSTREWARD.

“Onit,andIwasroudwhenIfirstsawit,butbyandbyInoticedthatwheneveranoldfriendofminecamealonghewouldhookhischinontherailingandullalongfaceandreadalongdowntillhecametothat,andthenhewouldchuckletohimselfandwalkoff,lookingsatisfiedandcomfortable.SoIscratcheditofftogetridofthosefools.Butadeadmanalwaystakesadealofrideinhismonument.YondergoeshalfadozenoftheJarvisesnow,withthefamilymonumentalong.AndSmithersandsomehiredsecterswentbywithhisawhileago.Hello,Higgins,good-by,oldfriend！That‘sMeredithHiggins-diedin’44-belongstooursetinthecemetery-fneoldfamily-great-grandmotherwasanInjun-Iamonthemostfamiliartermswithhimhedidn‘thearmewasthereasonhedidn’tanswerme.AndIamsorry,too,becauseIwouldhavelikedtointroduceyou.Youwouldadmirehim.Heisthemostdisjointed,sway-backed,andgenerallydistortedoldskeletonyoueversaw,butheisfulloffun.Whenhelaughsitsoundslikerasingtwostonestogether,andhealwaysstartsitoffwithacheeryscreechlikerakinganailacrossawindow-ane.Hey,Jones！ThatisoldColumbusJones-shroudcostfourhundreddollarsentiretrousseau,includingmonument,twenty-sevenhundred.Thiswasinthesringof1926.Itwasenormousstyleforthosedays.DeadeolecameallthewayfromtheAlleghaniestoseehisthings-theartythatoccuiedthegravenexttomineremembersitwell.Nowdoyouseethatindividualgoingalongwithaieceofahead-boardunderhisarm,oneleg-bonebelowhiskneegone,andnotathingintheworldon?ThatisBarstowDalhousie,andnexttoColumbusJoneshewasthemostsumtuouslyoutfittedersonthateverenteredourcemetery.Weareallleaving.Wecannottoleratethetreatmentwearereceivingatthehandsofourdescendants.Theyoennewcemeteries,buttheyleaveustoourignominy.Theymendthestreets,buttheynevermendanythingthatisaboutusorbelongstous.Lookatthatcoffnofmine-yetItellyouinitsdayitwasaieceoffurniturethatwouldhaveattractedattentioninanydrawing-roominthiscity.Youmayhaveitifyouwantit-Ican‘taffordtoreairit.Putanewbottominher,andartofanewto,andabitoffreshliningalongtheleftside,andyou’llfindheraboutascomfortableasanyrecetacleofherseciesyouevertried.Nothanksno,don‘tmentionityouhavebeenciviltome,andIwouldgiveyoualltheroertyIhavegotbeforeIwouldseemungrateful.Nowthiswinding-sheetisakindofasweetthinginitsway,ifyouwouldliketo-No?Well,justasyousay,butIwishedtobefairandliberalthere’snothingmeanaboutme.Good-by,friend,Imustbegoing.Imayhaveagoodwaytogotonight-don‘tknow.Ionlyknowonethingforcertain,andthatisthatIamontheemigranttrailnow,andI’llneversleeinthatcrazyoldcemeteryagain.IwilltraveltillIfendresectablequarters,ifIhavetohoofittoNewJersey.Alltheboysaregoing.Itwasdecidedinublicconclave,lastnight,toemigrate,andbythetimethesunrisestherewontbeaboneleftinouroldhabitations.Suchcemeteriesmaysuitmysurvivingfriends,buttheydonotsuittheremainsthathavethehonortomaketheseremarks.Myoinionisthegeneraloinion.Ifyoudoubtit,goandseehowthedeartingghostsusetthingsbeforetheystarted.Theywerealmostriotousintheirdemonstrationsofdistaste.Hello,herearesomeoftheBledsoes,andifyouwillgivemealiftwiththistombstoneIguessIwilljoincomanyandjogalongwiththem-mightyresectableoldfamily,theBledsoes,andusedtoalwayscomeoutinsix-horsehearsesandallthatsortofthingfftyyearsagowhenIwalkedthesestreetsindaylight.Goodby,friend.”

Andwithhisgravestoneonhisshoulderhejoinedthegrislyrocession,dragginghisdamagedcoffnafterhim,fornotwithstandingheressedituonmesoearnestly,Iutterlyrefusedhishositality.Isuosethatforasmuchastwohoursthesesadoutcastswentclackingby,ladenwiththeirdismaleffects,andallthattimeIsatityingthem.Oneortwooftheyoungestandleastdilaidatedamongtheminquiredaboutmidnighttrainsontherailways,buttherestseemedunacquaintedwiththatmodeoftravel,andmerelyaskedaboutcommonublicroadstovarioustownsandcities,someofwhicharenotonthemanow,andvanishedfromitandfromtheearthasmuchasthirtyyearsago,andsomefewofthemneverhadexistedanywherebutonmas,andrivateonesinreal-estateagenciesatthat.Andtheyaskedabouttheconditionofthecemeteriesinthesetownsandcities,andaboutthereutationthecitizensboreastoreverenceforthedead.

Thiswholematterinterestedmedeely,andlikewisecomelledmysymathyforthesehomelessones.Anditallseemingreal,andInotknowingitwasadream,Imentionedtooneshroudedwandereranideathathadenteredmyheadtoublishanaccountofthiscuriousandverysorrowfulexodus,butsaidalsothatIcouldnotdescribeittruthfully,andjustasitoccurred,withoutseemingtotrifewithagravesubjectandexhibitanirreverenceforthedeadthatwouldshockanddistresstheirsurvivingfriends.Butthisblandandstatelyremnantofaformercitizenleanedhimfarovermygateandwhiseredinmyear,andsaid：

“Donotletthatdisturbyou.Thecommunitythatcanstandsuchgraveyardsasthoseweareemigratingfromcanstandanythingabodycansayabouttheneglectedandforsakendeadthatlieinthem.”

Atthatverymomentacockcrowed,andtheweirdrocessionvanishedandleftnotashredorabonebehind.Iawoke,andfoundmyselflyingwithmyheadoutofthebedand“sagging”downwardconsiderably-aositionfavorabletodreamingdreamswithmoralsinthem,maybe,butnotoetry.

NOTE.-Thereaderisassuredthatifthecemeteriesinhistownareketingoodorder,thisDreamisnotleveledathistownatall,butisleveledarticularlyandvenomouslyatthenexttown.

前天夜里，我做了一个古怪的梦。梦里的我坐在门前的台阶上（我也不知道这是哪个城市）沉思，时间可能是夜里12点或1点。天气温和宜人，四周寂静无声。除了远处偶尔传来的几声悠远的狗叫，以及更远处若有若无的狗吠回应外，再也听不到任何其他声音，四周一片死寂。不久，我听到大街上传来一阵类似骨头摩擦的咔咔声，我以为那是小夜曲演奏会上响板的声音。不一会儿，一个高大的骷髅，戴着布帽，半裹着发霉的裹尸布——裹尸布的碎片和脱线在其躯体周围吊着——迈着庄重的步伐，从我面前走过，很快便消失在星光朦胧的夜幕里。他的肩上扛着一口破旧且被虫蛀了的棺材，手里拿着一个包裹。我这才明白，咔咔声原来是这具骷髅的关节以及他的手肘碰到身体发出的声音。我惊诧不已，还没来得及思考这个幽灵的出现究竟意味着，这个时候，我听到另一阵咔咔声，这预示着又一个幽灵向我走来。他扛着大半口棺材，腋下夹着头脚两端的木板。我极力想看清他帽子下的脸，和他说几句话，但当他转过身，用他那空洞无物的眼睛和突出的颌骨向我龇牙咧嘴地笑着走过的时候，我想还是不阻止他为妙。他刚走不远，咔咔声再次响起，昏暗中又有一具骷髅出现了，他弓着腰背着一个沉重的墓碑，身后用绳索拖着一口破烂的棺材。走到我跟前的时候，他盯住我看了一会儿，然后转过身，对我说：

“帮我把这个卸下来，可以吗？”

我帮他把墓碑卸下来放在地上，这时，我看到墓碑上刻着“约翰·巴克斯特·科普曼赫斯特，1839年5月”——这是他死亡的时间。死者疲倦地坐在我身边，用他的上颌骨擦了一下他的前额骨——我想这大概是习惯使然吧，因为我没有看见任何汗水被他擦下来。

“太糟糕了，真是太糟糕了！”他把身上破烂的裹尸布又裹了裹，用手托着下巴。然后，他抬起左脚，搭在右膝盖上，用一颗从棺材里拿出的锈钉子若无其事地挠他的脚踝。

“什么事情这么糟，朋友？”

“噢，所有的事情，所有的事情，我真希望我没有死。”

“太奇怪了，你为什么这样说呢？出了什么问题？到底怎么了？”

“怎么了？看看这些裹尸布条，看看这个墓碑，都碎了。再看看这口丢人的破棺材。一个人的所有财产就在他的眼皮底下化为灰烬，你还问他怎么了？地狱般的灾难啊！”

“冷静些，冷静些，”我说，“太糟了，这的确很糟糕。不过，我没想到，以你目前的状况，你还会如此在乎这些事情。”

“唉，我亲爱的先生，我当然在乎。我的自尊受到了伤害，我的舒适生活遭到了损害——或者说是被毁了。我要说说我的遭遇——我会用你能听懂的方式讲给你听，如果你愿意听的话。”可怜的骷髅一边说着，一边把裹尸布上的帽子翻到脑后，像是在为陈述作准备，这也使他不知不觉换上了一副与他忧郁的性情显得格格不入的喜悦欢快的神态——换句话说吧——此时，他的神态与他悲伤的心情形成了鲜明的对比。

“请讲。”我催促道。

“我住在离这大概一两个街区外的一块令人觉得羞耻的破旧墓地里，就在这条街上——你瞧，我这块软骨都要掉下来了——从下面数第三根肋骨，朋友，如果你有绳子，请把它的末端绑在我的脊椎骨上，虽说我更喜欢用银线，更耐用更好看，如果让它保持光洁——想想看，因为子孙们的冷漠忽视，它就这样变成碎片了！”说到这里，可怜的鬼魂把牙齿咬得咯咯作响。他的这个举动令我毛骨悚然——因为在没有皮肤和肌肉的情况下，这个动作的效果显得更加突出。“我住在那个破旧的墓地已经整整30年了。告诉你吧，自从我这把老骨头睡在那里后，一切都变了。当时，我翻了翻身体，舒展四肢，开始大睡，心情非常愉快。心想，这下终于可以摆脱烦恼、悲伤、担忧、疑虑和恐惧了。怀着安详、满足的心情，我聆听着教堂司事的干活声，从他第一铲土在我的棺材上发出巨大声响，到这种声音渐渐沉闷消失，直到最后为我的新居修建坟顶时发出的隐隐的拍土声——简直太惬意了！哎！希望今晚你也试一试！”我正思考的时候，死者突然用他那干枯的手给了我一巴掌。

“是啊，先生，30年前我搬到那里时，是很快乐的。因为当时，那个地方还处于偏远的乡下——那里微风轻拂，花儿绽放，古木参天。慵懒的风和树叶聊天，松鼠在我们周围打闹嬉戏，爬虫拜访我们，安宁静谧的天地充满了鸟儿的歌声。在那样的环境里，一个人就算少活十年也值了。一切都那么美好，我的邻居们也很好，因为我周围的人都来自城里最好的家庭。我们的子孙们把一切都安排妥当，我们的坟墓被他们保护得非常好，篱笆修剪得一丝不苟。头顶板是油漆或者粉饰的，只要稍微褪色或是腐朽，他们就会给我们换新的。墓碑总是笔直地矗立在那里，护栏完整无缺，亮闪闪的。玫瑰和灌木被修剪得整整齐齐，完美无瑕。墙壁使用砾石镶嵌，干净光滑。但这些日子都过去了，我的后代忘记了我。我的孙子住在豪华的房屋里，那可是用我这双老手挣来的钱盖起来的，而我却睡在无人问津的荒坟里，任臭虫啃噬我的裹尸布。这些虫子想用这东西给它们筑窝。我跟我的邻居们为这座美丽城市的繁荣打下了牢固的基础，可我们热爱的那些人却任凭我们在这被乡邻诅咒、行人嘲笑的破坟里腐烂。你明白从前和现在的不同了吧——比如说吧，我们的坟墓现在都塌了，我们的棺材靠头一端的顶板都碎了，我们的护栏东倒西歪，一端斜翘着。我们的墓志铭东倒西歪，而我们的墓碑则无精打采地低垂着。装饰和点缀都没了——没有玫瑰，没有灌木，没有砾石小路或是任何其他顺眼的东西，甚至那道没有油漆过的用旧木板做的、用来帮我们隔开野兽和免受践踏的篱笆，也已经歪歪斜斜地躺在马路一边了。现在，它唯一的作用就是向世人展示我们墓地的凄凉，从而招来更多的嘲笑。现在，我们无法再借助这片友好的树林来遮掩我们的贫穷和破败了，因为这座城市已经伸开它正在萎缩的胳膊，将我们揽了进去。我们昔日欢乐的旧居，现在只剩下一些悲伤的大树矗立在那里。它们厌倦了都市的生活，它们的根伸进了我们的棺材里，它们凝望着模糊的远方，希望能生长在那里。告诉你吧，这简直就是莫大的耻辱！”

“你开始了解了吧——你开始明白现在的情况了吧。当我们的后代在我们身边的城市里穷奢极欲地挥霍我们的钱财时，我们却不得不拼命保全自己的残躯。老天，我们的坟墓没有一座不漏水的——哪怕有一座也好啊。每当夜里下雨的时候，我们就只能爬出来，睡在树上——有时候冰冷的雨水流进后脖颈，我们就会被惊醒。告诉你，此时所有的老骷髅都不得不顶起墓盖，踢翻墓碑，忙着往树上爬！上帝，在这样的夜晚里，如果你12点以后去那里，你就会看到有15个之多的骷髅，单腿挂在树上，各个关节发出咔咔的响声，任由狂风吹过我们的肋骨。多少次，我们不得不在树上待三四个小时，直到冻僵了才能下来。大家非常困乏，还要借彼此的颅骨把坟墓里的水舀出来。如果你现在朝我的嘴巴里瞧一瞧，我把头往后一仰，你就会看到我头颅的一半已经塞满了积淀的水垢——有时候这让我感到头重脚轻，愚蠢至极！是啊，先生，许多次，如果你凑巧在黎明前赶到那里，你就会发现我们正从坟墓里往外舀水，而篱笆上则正晾着我们的裹尸布。我曾有一块像样的裹尸布，就是有一天早晨在那里被偷走的。我想可能是那个名叫史密斯的人干的。这个人住在那边的平民墓地里——之所以这么说，是因为我初次见到他的时候，他只穿着一件格子衬衫，可是我最近一次看到他，在新墓地的一次聚会上，他是来宾中穿着最体面的——更重要的是，他一看见我就离开了。然后，一位老妇人的棺材也不见了——她出去的时候一般都带着棺材，因为她待在外边的时间长了容易着凉，引起痉挛性风湿病发作，她本来就是因此而死的。她叫霍奇基斯——安娜·马蒂尔德·霍奇基斯——也许你认识她。她有两颗上门牙，个子挺高，但是背有些驼，左边一根肋骨没了，一绺头发耷拉在脑袋左边，一小撮在头顶上，还有几根在右耳朵前边。她的下颌骨一边松了，用铁丝拴着，左前臂的小骨头早不见了——是在一次打架中失去的——走起路来一副盛气凌人的样子，双手像背带似的叉在腰间，鼻孔朝天——她一直一副得意扬扬的样子，可现在一切全都毁了，全都没了。而她看上去就像是废墟堆里装女王陶的板条箱——或许你见过她？”